Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for July 19, 2012

On the bright side, all the feature films include a rude audience member talking on their phone throughout the performance.

$6 soda and $9 popcorn not included.

and they are all sequels

Wow – it’s the Michael Bay Theater!

With a special tribute to the Farrelly brothers…

Nudity is never gratuitous.

Go to to any of them. The Previews of coming attractions show you all the Highlights of the rest of the movies anyway.

Stay home and read a book (you remember what they are).

Saskfan, close enough, if you’ve got something like The Snow Fly, or Fluke on it….

If i go in there will they let me out?

I think I almost resemble that remark.

You missed ‘remakes of remakes of stuff that wasn’t worth making in the first place’.

19-25 for me!

31-35 White people problems.

Seems like there’s less gratuitous nudity now than there was in the 70s and 80s. Not enough, in fact.

That couple seems a tad too old for today’s target movie market.

On my blu-ray player; Shakespeare and opera from Netflix. Yeah, I’m a cultural elitist, and proud of it.

I shudder to think what a remake of Casablanca would be like.

Fortunately, I have my own collection of classic movies to watch. I’m not even curious as to what’s in the theatre now.

36 – 50: People complaining about getting old.

70 – 90: Octogenarians telling them to get over it and have some fun! Starring Betty White.

90 – 114: Lots of gratuitous death scenes. Movies end on a depressing note and everyone wonders why they bothered to go to the movies that day.

but not if it’s “gay” boy stuff. ick.

Best movie – http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1412386/

@WaitingMan – and yet, you read the funny papers! (Actually, I’m with you, for the most part…But I MUST have my comics!)

That would be funny! What? Well, what if the “gratuitous nudity” on the billboard meat that the AUDIENCE was required to be nude?!

Wiley’s cartoon is an exact replica of what’s playing at my local mutli-plex. This is the reason I don’t go to the movies anymore. And I used to work in the industry !

Out in the cold is the couple who just want to enjoy a flick. They’ve already asked a friend if there’s a real gem in this mess. And they’re waiting for it to hit the $1 theater. They already know what’s in the small print after asterik…. Brought to you by investing conglomerates who don’t care how they mess up your synapse as long as you keep paying for more.. Beware 19-25 nudie fans, replacing brain cells with glands always ends in the $10 line acting like a 1-4 guy.

I think the last movie I saw in the theaters was Coraline . . oh wait . . . I take that back. I was visiting the BF’s family and they wanted to see Bad Teacher. (aka. Bad Movie) I usually don’t bother going to the theater unless there’s something I really want to see. I think the next time I step foot in a theater will be in December for The Hobbit. Until then, I don’t feel like I’m missing much.

Hey, when you wear hearing aids, you can’t make out what they’re saying, so it doesn’t matter what movie you see. Besides, the theaters are air conditioned:) Good for napping.

26-30: Doesn’t matter what the movie is because the couple two rows behind you brought their screaming infant to “save money on a sitter”….

Just eating my popcorn and whey drink and the thing comes right in and sits down.

Ugh; feature movies with quiet voices amplified, then music swells to hearing-damage levels. I watch movies on DVD now, and turn the volume up for the dialogue, then down for the music. That being said, I did go to the Hubble 3-D movie at the local Imax. Wore earplugs, ‘cause I expected the volume: hey, when you watch a shuttle launch – from the launch pad! – you KNOW it’s going to be loud. Plus they advertise having something like 15,000 watts of sound, in a theatre where a halfway-decent tech could easily make everything audible with under 90 watts.

I almost never go to movies – small screen is good enough for me – and I don’t have to use ear plugs.

It’s a tough choice between 5-9 and 19-25.

@JohnnyDiegono

“Dances with Wolves” was the last movie @ the theatre. Switched to DVD and am much happier to be able to stop when I need to have a kitchen break. Thanks Wiley, the reviews are positively accurate!

sounds about right

And people wonder why I don’t go out to the movies.

Sounds good to me!

19-25! 19-25!

I’ll have a serving or two of 5-9 Macho Guys and of 19-25 Explosions and stuff, with a 3/4 serving of 14-18 Animation (if no adults in the story – then a full serving)

“No one gets to be a hero by being normal.” .. Friend wants to see Disney’s “Brave”. The trailer looks ok. But “ParaNorman”? Now that looks like a fun romp. .