Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 24, 2019

I wonder what Rat likes best about Miss America. They don’t have a “Get drunk and party” category.

“Lowdown – Feeling pretty bad, feeling likeI lost the best friend that I ever had…”

You want to know what’s going on, Pig? I missed “It” and I don’t regret doing so.

Rat, there isn’t anything better on than a tired old pageant?

That is what we are hoping North Korean missiles do: Miss America. If they do miss, try to avoid the “Nanner, nanner, missed me” face.

I don’t miss Miss America. Those beauties would never give me the time of day even back then.

Americans have always missed an America that never was…

What America do you miss Pig? Throughout history there have been many Americas.

You ARE in America Piggy

I miss the America I used to come and visit as a Canadian: friendly, 20 second conversation, nothing to prove, welcome to America….not like that anymore.

Good thing Rat wasn’t watching Miss World or Miss Universe!

When was that, Pig?

The other day the lads have a Flat screen. Today it is old school. ……..….Croc Power !

I miss America too! it’s been …what….about 5 years now……

We never “all got along.” There was that whole Civil War thing, among others.

Pig is hilarious!

“I’d rather be Russian then Democrat.”

“The good old days weren’t always good and tomorrow ain’t as bad as it seems”

When was that? 9-12-2001?

Yeah, me too.

," Can’t we all just get along? " – that dude in L.A. back in the 90s. CLUB! CLUB! – the L A. cops. CRASH! POW! – the L.A. rioters.

When we all got along??? you mean… never?

Yes, Pig, many of us miss Rodney King.

Its not that we got along all that well, just that fewer of us opted for murder to end the disagreement.

Politics is definitely more divisive than it used to be. It started pretty much when the Cold War ended.

get along?

that ship has not only sailed, it’s been dive-bombed and sunk

“Horse with No Name” was downright groundbreaking for a debut single. “Sister Golden Hair”, “Tin Man”, “Ventura Highway”, all awesome followups. But they haven’t had an actual hit since 1982’s “You Can Do Magic”, and it’s about time to make America great again.

I think I know where we can get some hats.

I remember being taught that when someone won and election, whether they were the candidate you voted for or not, you congratulated them and gave them your support.

Endgame comes out in 2 days!

No, actually, I don’t. I do remember being somewhat tolerant of opposing views, though.

One of the few times that Pig is more accurate then Rat!

“As a young girl she ran wild, Freely gave herself to men who understood”

We have never gotten along. The history of America is rife with internal conflict. The greatness of her lies in our ability to progress in spite of the conflict. Unfortunately the times when we seem to be most “unified” has been when we were facing a common “enemy.” Most recently after 9/11. It’s human nature, and America is the best/worst example of it.

Never really always got along. There are always opposing views. Just didn’t have social media to regurgitate it 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. The result being its made it more difficult to compromise now.

Um… No? When was this, exactly?

“America where are you now?Don’t you care about your sons and daughters?Don’t you know we need you nowWe can’t fight alone against the monster”

The main minority being suppressed today are those from India. And this is being done by the “caring” leftists and socialists.

And, she ain’t coming back. :(

Politics aside, we really did used to be more civil and kind to each other as individuals. That seems to have gone away and been replaced with a self centered attitude. I blame culture in its entirety and not just politics for this. Once we emulated Ozzie and Harriet. Now days it’s The Simpson’s. The world has changed and not in a good way. I’m at a loss to explain why. I collect old vintage readers. Back in the 50s and 60s the stories focused on being kind and helping our neighbors, etc. You won’t find that in today’s reading books.

One thing most foreign governments and terrorist groups don’t understand is that the US may be a big, loud squabbling family, minus the nutters and self-absorbed on both sides, but we tend to pull together as one in times of need. We take care of each other in tragedies like natural disasters, and we face true enemies as a mostly united front because that’s the American character. After that, it’s back to squabbling because giving your opinion is also the American character.

Who started the “you don’t have to work, the government will take care of you”?

Look, Pig has a blue belly button! Oh… wait…

I remember the old days. Two things you never talk about, religion and politics.

Civic relations’re always better when there’re Gauls at the Gate…

nope

This is so funny, the laughs will knock the energizer bunny out!

I was pining for the good old days of “barely standing each other in public.”

There’s a very good chance I’ll be moving to an Asian country by the end of the year and the sort of partisan snark on this thread (and public discourse) is one thing I WOULDN’T Miss about America. I like the idea of living in a place where harmony and respect matter and people genuinely want to be happy…and that ain’t here.

If the stubborn idiots in the other political party would just listen to reason, we’d all get along great.

The time when we all got along was around the same time we all agreed that truth was truth. Coincidence?

I’m guessing Pig may be missing the days before we had social media. Back then, we had limited contact with people outside our own communities and we used to not know just exactly how many people disliked us. Nowadays, we can start up our web browsers and find thousands of people we don’t know. Many of them feel free to express their dislike for certain others in various ways.

I Miss America and was in Miss America.

Being somewhat Older than the Hills, I remember Bert Parks, back when watching the Miss America Show on TV was a thing families could and did do together. Now, I have no idea whether the show, in any form, still exists, nor do I care.

O tempora! O mores!

Bravo!

Pastis: when he isn’t make puns, he is getting us riled up…we love that guy!

HA!