Super-Fun-Pak Comix by Ruben Bolling for December 27, 2022

But there’s no trophy for the second-most boring middle-aged man, so there.

I usually have to swap gazpacho recipes to win one of those.

There is no participation trophy for drawing Doug. There is tropy only for the best drawn Doug.

I was robbed!

If you’ve ever complained about participation trophies, know that you too are competing in the Most Boring Middle-Aged Man competition.

I expect you to:

- take time out of what you want to do, to do what I want you to do;

- to wear special clothes I specify (sports kit or uniform), even if you have to buy them;

- to learn the rules I specify and adhere to them;

- to practice or rehearse to an acceptable standard, in your own time and at your own expense;

- to go to a place I specify;

- at a time I specify;

- to make an event happen by participating;

- for which I get the credit and publicity for arranging it;

and now YOU expect ME to give you something in return for participating???!?!?!?! How ungrateful is that?

(Do I need to point out that is sarcasm? If so, take a long hard look at your selfish values.)

When I was in grammar school in the ’50s I was in an after school rec program at a neighboring park. All the kids got a certificate of participation. It was a diploma style printed form on vellumy paper but the name and date were hand lettered with a Speedball pen. I really liked it, not because it boosted my self esteem but because I liked the paper and the calligraphy.

Shiny!