Nancy Classics by Ernie Bushmiller for September 21, 2019

Weight loss pills in the ’40s and ’50s were amphetamines.

Nancy, the meth dealer.

Nancy goes on the “Naughty” list.

“Santa, you’re somewhere between Nicki Minaj and Kim K.!”

She doesn’t want “Santa” to get stuck in the chimney and have to call the fire department to get him out!

Santa’s got back!

You mean, THERE’S REALLY A SANTA! ???

Oh Nancy, have a heart – it’s Christmas (at least in this comic) and if that is truly the real Santa, he’ll find a way to enter your home and he won’t need reducing pills.

Nancy, Nancy, Nancy… Don’t you know Santa uses trans-dimensional engineering to navigate those chimneys? Learned it from The Doctor. (Heck – how do you think he gets to every kid’s household in one night?)

I guess that if a parental figure is going to let her eight year old wander around town unsupervised, she’s not going to sweat letting her climb up on the roof and carrying around a controlled substance.

You know what “Reducing Pills” were back in those days, don’t you? Usually dexedrines; basically what we now call amphetamines. Was also used by the military as a ‘go-pill’ during missions requiring extended alertness such as night-time bombing missions or extended combat operations.Ironically, dexedrine (and related drugs adderall, etc.) is now actually prescribed to treat ADHD.

1- Doh dee doh 2-Dee doh dee 3-Hmmmmm… 4-NANCY Hey lardo. You left me these pills last year to help me drop a few. They didn’t work for me and they clearly ain’t doing anything for you. SANTA: The bottle’s full. You gotta take ‘em dum dum. NANCY: Oh. I planted the bottle in the yard. I thought they were like magic beans. SANTA: Forget about me kid. You need to see the Wizard about a brain. NANCY: Cool. What corner is he workin’?

“As seen on TV…”

My question is “Who would let a little girl like Nancy climb up a pitched roof?” Doesn’t look like there is any supervision around.

Desperate girl.