In the Bleachers by Ben Zaehringer for February 02, 2023

Well the Cowboys kicker should be safe

The word reached them of how placekickers have treated footballs here on earth. (Reminds me of Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home)

Is that HAL 9000?

As long as its Chris Boswell and not Justin Tucker

Change Hal to Brett and we will all be happy.

He’s in trouble now….who knew?

Please wait until after the Super Bowl.

They’re gonna get even for all the times he kicked their balls.

The real reason Tom Brady retired

There’s always someone that gets offended.

" Take us to your Leader..in points scored!"

Don’t worry Hal, it’s only for a couple of seasons and then they will come back for some other younger kicker….

“And besides, you may look at them and see captivity, but I look at them and see… targets.”

Sports equipment as intelligent life. Nope, I can’t think of a precedent.

Still, more of a Robot Chicken setup….a bunch of anthropomorphic soccer balls rescue Wilson from Tom Hanks Castaway in a boat, leaving Tom once more alone on the island.

Hello! My name is Inigo Balltoya. You kicked my father! Prepare to die!

Just don’t give them the tee.