A farmer’s dog came into town, his christian name was RuntA noble pedigree had he, noblesse oblige his stuntAnd as he trotted down the street, ’twas beautiful to seeHis work at every corner and his work at every tree
He watered every gateway, too, and never missed a postFor piddling was his specialty and piddling was his boastThey city curs looked on amazed with deep and jealous rageTo see a simple country dog, the piddler of the age
Then all the dogs from everywhere were summoned by a yellTo sniff the country stranger o’er and judge him by his smellSome thought that he a king might be, beneath his tail a roseSo every city dog drew nigh and sniffed it up his nose
They smelled him over one by one, they smelled him two by twoAnd noble Runt, in high disdain, stood still ‘til they were throughThen just to show the whole shebang he didn’t care a dam’He trotted to a grocery store and piddled on a ham
He piddled in a mackerel keg, he piddled on the floorAnd when the grocer kicked him out, he piddled through the doorBehind him all the city dogs lined up with instinct trueTo start a piddling carnival and see the stranger through
They showed him every piddling post they had in all the townAnd started in, with many a wink, to pee the stranger downThey sent for champion piddlers who were always on the goWho sometimes did a piddling stunt or gave a piddling show
They sprung these on him suddenly when midway in the townRunt only smiled and polished off the ablest, white and brownFor Runt was with them every trick, with vigor and with vimA thousand piddlers more or less were all the same to him
So he was wetting merrily with hind legs kicking highWhen most were hoisting legs in bluff and piddling mighty dryThen on and on Runt sought new grounds, by piles of scrap and rust’Til every city dog went dry and only piddled dust
But ever on went noble Runt, as wet as any rillAnd all the champion city pups were peed to a standstillThen Runt did freehand piddling with fancy flirts and frillsLike “double drip” and “gimlet twist” and all those graceful things
And all the time this country dog did never wink nor grinBut piddled blithely out of town as he had piddled inThe city dogs a convention held to ask, “What did defeat us?”But no one ever put them wise that Runt had diabetes!
Our male chihuahua can go many, many hours without peeing. He goes outside and stands on the step, watching the female Boston terrier while she does he business in the morning, then he just—goes back inside. Bladder of steel!
Gent almost 3 years ago
No they doesn’t leaves messages. They marks territories.
kevin almost 3 years ago
A farmer’s dog came into town, his christian name was RuntA noble pedigree had he, noblesse oblige his stuntAnd as he trotted down the street, ’twas beautiful to seeHis work at every corner and his work at every tree
He watered every gateway, too, and never missed a postFor piddling was his specialty and piddling was his boastThey city curs looked on amazed with deep and jealous rageTo see a simple country dog, the piddler of the age
Then all the dogs from everywhere were summoned by a yellTo sniff the country stranger o’er and judge him by his smellSome thought that he a king might be, beneath his tail a roseSo every city dog drew nigh and sniffed it up his nose
They smelled him over one by one, they smelled him two by twoAnd noble Runt, in high disdain, stood still ‘til they were throughThen just to show the whole shebang he didn’t care a dam’He trotted to a grocery store and piddled on a ham
He piddled in a mackerel keg, he piddled on the floorAnd when the grocer kicked him out, he piddled through the doorBehind him all the city dogs lined up with instinct trueTo start a piddling carnival and see the stranger through
They showed him every piddling post they had in all the townAnd started in, with many a wink, to pee the stranger downThey sent for champion piddlers who were always on the goWho sometimes did a piddling stunt or gave a piddling show
continued…
kevin almost 3 years ago
They sprung these on him suddenly when midway in the townRunt only smiled and polished off the ablest, white and brownFor Runt was with them every trick, with vigor and with vimA thousand piddlers more or less were all the same to him
So he was wetting merrily with hind legs kicking highWhen most were hoisting legs in bluff and piddling mighty dryThen on and on Runt sought new grounds, by piles of scrap and rust’Til every city dog went dry and only piddled dust
But ever on went noble Runt, as wet as any rillAnd all the champion city pups were peed to a standstillThen Runt did freehand piddling with fancy flirts and frillsLike “double drip” and “gimlet twist” and all those graceful things
And all the time this country dog did never wink nor grinBut piddled blithely out of town as he had piddled inThe city dogs a convention held to ask, “What did defeat us?”But no one ever put them wise that Runt had diabetes!
Liverlips McCracken Premium Member almost 3 years ago
He’s bluffing. In truth, he couldn’t think of any snappy comebacks before.
MRBLUESKY529 almost 3 years ago
Doggie Facebook.
Doug K almost 3 years ago
“You don’t have to leave a message now. I’m right here.”
[“What are we (becoming) – people with cell phones?”]
Triker2011 almost 3 years ago
My two little Westies leave P-Mail everywhere they go.
Jeffin Premium Member almost 3 years ago
More dry humor.
dflak almost 3 years ago
Pee mail and smell check.
snowedin, now known as Missy's mom Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Our male chihuahua can go many, many hours without peeing. He goes outside and stands on the step, watching the female Boston terrier while she does he business in the morning, then he just—goes back inside. Bladder of steel!
mfrasca almost 3 years ago
The printer is out of paper.
the lost wizard almost 3 years ago
That’s okay. I had other business that needed to get done.
Radish the wordsmith almost 3 years ago
He’s out of toner too.
WCraft Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Don’t you hate it when your ink cartridge goes empty in the middle of printing?
Stephen Gilberg almost 3 years ago
“What has taken me six hours and twenty cups of tea, he has achieved in fifteen minutes.” —Farley Mowat
joem5636 almost 3 years ago
Is there a theme-of-the-day for cartoons? Red and Rover is almost identical!