Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for December 20, 2020

I recently had a dream where Winnie the Pooh couldn’t find any honey, and he was so desperate for the stuff he started eating his own boogers (which had a similar color and texture to honey), until eventually he was pulling out chunks of his own brain through his nose and eating THAT.

I once had a dream about performing in a play, only to get on stage and realize I didn’t even know what the show was supposed to be. But instead of being embarrassed, I was wondering what the audience was even doing there before we’d had our first rehearsal.

I had one where I went to college. Funny thing is I don’t remember signing up, I had no transportation, it was in the middle of a desert and it was far. Thankfully I had an answer: Just say “Screw it” and go back to bed.

wow

GYUH!

Most of my bad dreams involve spiders, occasionally of the monstrous variety.

Of the non-nightmare variety: I did once have a dream about a Cactuar mariachi band. I’m not sure if that’s more or less awesome than Phoebe’s dream about the giant talking McNugget that was yelling at her about nutrition.

My anxiety dreams mostly consist of my smart phone breaking and school and I haven’t attended any college classes since running out of money for classes.

Phoebe’s dream sounds like George Miller, Tim Burton and Guillermo del Torro collaborated on a Mad Maz sequel.

I had one about going to school, realizing I’d be late getting to the classroom, then that I wasn’t even sure I was going in the right direction to find the classroom, and then that I hadn’t studied the lesson the night before … oh, and then I realized I was supposed to be the teacher.

Mari has it easy in this life.

It’s not a competition, you two…

Unicorns get anxious? UNICORN!

Why is it I can remember the details of my nightmares, but never the ones of those Fantastic dreams you don’t want to wake up from?

Happy Holidays, Dana Simpson. Your Phoebe is just precious.

Is this where we make the “badgers, we don’t need any stinking badgers” joke?

Now that I stop having nightmares about being back with the ex-wife from hell, most of my nightmares involve going back to college and being perpetually behind.

The kid has issues.

Love Pheeb’s body language in the last panel.

Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger

Phoebe really shouldn’t badger Marigold like that.

I had a dream where I was roller skating in a strange school and crashed into a styrofoam sofa and it exploding everywhere in people’s faces right when it was Picture Day.