Ravens are a Conspiracy.
Do I need to explain your job to you again?
No, but I’d like to hear your description of it, just for kicks.
I poked around Dana’s twitter, and… did she say they’re making a movie?
Liar Liar or The Truman Show?
It’s not that I see it as a competition. I just happen to naturally be on the internet at upload time.
A lot of animals consider direct eye contact to be a territorial threat. Someday, being absorbed in their phone is going to save someone’s life because of this.
Of course they had an effect. Once he put them on, he knew about Orville Redenbacher.
It’s always awkward when past friends come back to haunt me. Past enemies, doubly so.
Well, he’s gotten twenty minutes worth of permanent marker out of his fur before. An hours worth is basically the same thing three times.
Oh, yeah, you. Remember when you kept flirting with me, and never got the message that I wasn’t interested? Even after my dad told me he saw you kissing another boy, you still persisted. Yeah, those were not good times. Go back to your real boyfriend.