Close to Home by John McPherson for May 14, 2020

And Grandpa Patsnozzle spoke and thus the Pirates Cove section of mini golf was created.

As for Bleeb, I don’t even want to go there. What the heck is he doing?

Cheers and a chug of beers to all the pirates in us.

The one on Hilton Head Island is free to veterans. Plus cool prizes with a hole in one.

I thought they’re called Pee Wee Golf!!

First day with the hook, can an eyepatch be far behind?

So he’s hoping the public will get hooked on his idea? Let’s see if he has the balls to handle this huge venture so it doesn’t putter out.

Start a garden tools and metal detector company and plant rumours of buried treasure.

’E’s not pinin’! ’E’s passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! ’E’s expired and gone to meet ‘is maker! ’E’s a stiff! Bereft of life, ‘e rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed ‘im to the perch ’e’d be pushing up the daisies! ‘Is metabolic processes are now ’istory! ’E’s off the twig! ’E’s kicked the bucket, ’e’s shuffled off ‘is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!

There is two chicken legs left…. I know let’s play musical chairs.

Aye, and when I become the nations leader I can use my office to advertise them and spend most weekends playing golf.

Trump or miniature golf? Double entendre?

I thought his Opa spoke German? :-o

looks like all three of them need to see the dentist.

“Aye Cap’n! Might we name them Pirates Island, Pirates Cove, Smuggler’s Cove, Buccaneer Bay, Blackbeard’s Mini, Pirates Mini golf, Pirates Putt, Pirates Adventure? All be good names, they be! (Sheesh! I need to surround myself with more imaginative Pirates, those that think outside the box!) …um, I mean… ARRRRRRR, aye, those all be good names, they be!”

Oh great! Now I have that stupid “Yo Ho. Yo Ho. The pirate life for me.” song stuck in my brain. Thanks for the ear wig. Not! Must …think …of …Tequila song. Aaaarrrghh!

The pirate on the right with the hook shortly after this was taken had a tragic accident which caused him to lose his other hand. The cause: practicing thorough covid preventative hand washing.

HA! A potshot at Donald Trump!

I’m just wondering if they’re gonna finish eating that chicken

Aye, I can can hook in some fine investors, that I can!

Justo Central North America, no Mexico or Canada.

Now who does that remind me of?

Trying to figure out why this one is funny too..