Birdbrains by Thom Bluemel for August 12, 2020

But if I hadn’t stopped them, I was on the immediately endangered species list.

Mr. HAMilton, are you ready to talk, or do we have to get rough and put you through the grind-er?

“I was being harassed by individuals who didn’t believe that the wolves were endangered, so I felt that I should prove it to them.”

He should use a “Survival of the fittest” defense

But they kept coming to my house in an attempt to blow down a brick house. I can’t stop them from giving themselves a heart attack.

Very true, and when you think about it, what’s another eaten pig anyway? I mean if the wolf doesn’t eat one, the humans will.

Mr hami…. aHA! I see what you did there.

Those wolves had little red riding hood. Why should I be eaten?