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Mar 25, 2013
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alternacensus
for those who find the quadrennial census unfulfilling, the census bureau has devised the following more creative forms.

the novelization form
woman: i've established the protagonist, person 1, as a 34-year-old unmarried black, african am. or negro female who commutes 23 minutes by subway or elevated to her job as a systems analyst, and now i'm blocking.

the video form
cameraman: we'll do a montage of our complete plumbing facilities and lay in some bernard herrmann cues on the soundtrack to heighten the tension.
oop: abso-fab-u-mongous.

the graphic novelization form
cartoonist: i've introduced agents of the census bureau as minions of zorgon, the evil alien hive-mind from uranus. hey! in your face, census bureau!

the craft project form
lady: i've made a family memory book with favorite photos, letters, pressed flowers, baby hair trimmings, dental records, tissues samples, gene sequences and my recipe for apricot pancakes!

the poetry form
poet: icelebrate myself & sing myself; i also celebrate & sing the seven other people living or staying in this house, apartment or mobile home on april 1, 2000.

the homage to "stomp" form
wham wham bang bang smash
oop: oops.
please keep all interpretive dances to 38 minutes.
Apr 1, 2013
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