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Richard's Poor Almanac

By Richard Thompson
4,309
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Dec 31, 2012
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if, however, you find lizards creepy, try this instead - lie in a dark room. now picture a tranquil scene, a meadow, say. all is serene. a sun-dappled brook murmurs peacefully, and a soothing breeze lightly stirs your hair. then boom - this guy jumps out from behind a tree, he's playing a kazoo & he's - he's juggling! he's juggling chainsaws & chihuahuas! no! no! it's horrible! fur is flying everywhere! abort! abort!
man: agh

when all else fails there's always the old standby - have your head cryogenically pre-served until the hangover passes & you're back to your old self again. and best of all, afterwards they give you ice cream!
wife: feeling better?
husband: mm-hm.
Jan 7, 2013
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