Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for September 23, 2019
September 22, 2019
September 24, 2019
Transcript:
summer weeding guide boorish ivy - if ignored will quickly grow into the shape of unwanted lawn objects (flamingo, chevy up on blocks, and large abandoned appliance). especially unnerving for those under autocratic neighborhood associations. flower 1: tie his shoelaces together! flower 2: pure evil! dandelion.org - densely intertwined root system creates a sentient hive-mind prone to acts of petty maliciousness. sphincterwort - (methanium) an entirely unnecessary evolutionary development. too nasty to even draw. touchyweed - oversensitive to the needs of rootbound americans. runs screaming to the aclu when pulled up. rakeseed - step on it and the stalk flies up and hits you in the face! nature at its most palyful! farmer: owch
gbars70 over 4 years ago
While mowing your lawn, sphincterwort can cause you much embarrassment.
WCraft Premium Member over 4 years ago
We should’ve heeded Richard’s warnings – touchyweed has spread uncontrollably in our society!
Jbarker1956 Premium Member over 4 years ago
Sphincterwort usually isn’t a problem after a horde of a Canadian Romping Sloths tramples through. Trust me.
DCBakerEsq over 4 years ago
Hornswaggle Root
AndrewSihler over 4 years ago
Methanium is often found around stands of stinkhorn mushrooms.
Sisyphos over 4 years ago
I don’t think I ever thought of Ma Nature as playful….
Night-Gaunt49[Bozo is Boffo] over 4 years ago
Very subtle military plants planted all over your country.