Nor as bad as wondering where you are and why you are there!!! Old-time Preacher asked his oldest parishioner if she thought about the hereafter. She promptly replied, “Yes, I think about it all the time! Every time I go into a room in my house, I ask myself, now, what am I here after?”
Your social security number only has three digits.
It takes a couple of tries to get over a speed bump.
You can live without sex but not your glasses.
When you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
When you look in the mirror one day and realize you look like the photo on your Costco card.
Old is…
Old is when your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.
Old is when you go to smooth the wrinkles in your hose, and you realize you’re not wearing any.
An elderly couple was watching television one evening. The wife said, “I am going to get a dish of ice cream now.” Kindly, the husband offered to get the ice cream for his wife. “I’ll write it down so you don’t forget,” she said.
“I won’t forget,” the old gent said. “But, I want chocolate syrup and nuts on it. So, I’ll write it down,” she replied.
“I will get you the ice cream. Don’t you worry,” replied the gentleman.
A few minutes later, the old man returned with bacon and eggs. His wife said, “See, I should have written it down because you forgot the toast.”
For even MORE: https://letterpile.com/humor/Senior-Humor-and-Wisdom
Note: When George Burns was in his 90s, he would often escort beautiful young ladies in their 20s to special events. When asked why he didn’t date women his own age, he responded, “There are no women my age!”
Olddog1 over 5 years ago
Not as bad as wondering where you’ve been.
LadyPeterW over 5 years ago
Nor as bad as wondering where you are and why you are there!!! Old-time Preacher asked his oldest parishioner if she thought about the hereafter. She promptly replied, “Yes, I think about it all the time! Every time I go into a room in my house, I ask myself, now, what am I here after?”
Yakety Sax over 5 years ago
You Know You’re Getting Old When…
Your social security number only has three digits.
It takes a couple of tries to get over a speed bump.
You can live without sex but not your glasses.
When you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
When you look in the mirror one day and realize you look like the photo on your Costco card.
Old is…
Old is when your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.
Old is when you go to smooth the wrinkles in your hose, and you realize you’re not wearing any.
An elderly couple was watching television one evening. The wife said, “I am going to get a dish of ice cream now.” Kindly, the husband offered to get the ice cream for his wife. “I’ll write it down so you don’t forget,” she said.
“I won’t forget,” the old gent said. “But, I want chocolate syrup and nuts on it. So, I’ll write it down,” she replied.
“I will get you the ice cream. Don’t you worry,” replied the gentleman.
A few minutes later, the old man returned with bacon and eggs. His wife said, “See, I should have written it down because you forgot the toast.”
For even MORE: https://letterpile.com/humor/Senior-Humor-and-Wisdom
Note: When George Burns was in his 90s, he would often escort beautiful young ladies in their 20s to special events. When asked why he didn’t date women his own age, he responded, “There are no women my age!”
jth over 5 years ago
We all wish you’d get older, Treggie.
Fontessa over 5 years ago
I forgot what I was going to say …