Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for January 17, 2019

Transcript:

richard's poor almanac inauguration day changes by richard thompson please be advised- metro will remove all of its trains and allowing only pedestrian traffic. fare cards will be 5% off. please enjoy your walk. thank you. if you have to bring your car into dc you'll be required to push it. thank you. kid: where's obama? mom: ask your father. guy: ten more inches, guys. all buildings on the mall will be skootched back about ten feet to make the place look bigger. any help would be appreciated. thank you. to confuse terrorists, various d.c. buildings will be painted with wile-e.-coyote-style fake tunnels. please be careful, especially if you're pushing your car. thank you. and we ask that you make any "rest room stops" before you enter the district. preferably in richmond, pittsburgh or boston. thank you. kid: i gotta go.