Close to Home by John McPherson for November 09, 2012

That’s right. God has a universe to run.

And ‘make my hair turn out perfect’.

Now how will she find her slipper??!

Don’t they have St. Anthony for the lost nail file?

“Anthony Anthony, please come around,Something is lost that’s gotta be found.”

My favorite is Mark Twain’s take on prayer and answers.

If God could get swamped, we’d all be in big trouble!

Lets save it for the really IMPORTANT things – like where did I put my keys!

Everyone remember God can’t do anything that would interfere or take anyone’s free will away either.

or better yet………………What should I make for dinner?

“Help me make this touchdown” applies here too. lol Funny today.

“Dear Praying People,This is God. I’m sorry but I can’t answer your prayers right now. Tim Tebow is fervently praying for me to help him complete his next pass, and has promised to do that little thing he does every time he thanks Me (he looks so cute when he does that).Your prayer is very important to Me. Please stay on your knees and the next angel, saint or deceased relative will be on the line to intercede for you.”

I’d have thought God would be having a slack period, what with baseball over for this year and no hockey games. How hard can it be to look after just the NFL and NBA players?

This was brilliantly done on SNL in the early ’90s with Sally Field as a pious (and overpraying) housewife and the great Phil Hartman as Jesus.

“God does not play dice.” – Albert Einstein

“…Or any other sports.” – Oxnate

Yes- the thanking of God for “helping me make a touchdown” seems pretty petty.

HE’s too busy consoling the Republicans.

Jazzlily: Just so you remember the answer may be NO!

Got 150 billion galaxies with 150 billion stars each, and that is just this universe. Take a number.