Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for September 08, 2015
Mom: "Calvin, if you ruin these stockings..! Dear, grab him!" Calvin: "NO! NO! NOT ROSALYN! AAAAAAAAAAA! HELP! DON'T LEAVE ME!!" Dad: "..And the neighbors' numbers are (pull a leg, will you?) by the phone" Rosalyn: "I told you my rates doubled, right?"