Mar 18, 2011
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Tom the Dancing Bug's Super-Fun-Pak Comix
Edited by Ruben Bolling
Recap Man
Recap Man: So your plan is to use your army of cyborgs to destroy middle city?! 
Robot: Yes, yes! But I'll never GET TO IT if you keep recapping the plot in the first panel!!
Recap Man: Let me get this straight...
Next - RECAP!!
Three-Act Screenplay Structure Funnies
Man: I want a cookie!
Man: Oh, no! I'll never get it! 
Man: No, wait! I got it! 
Ghost of James Caan
James Caan Ghost: Son, you don't understand! 
Director: Cut! 
Director: Ghost of James Caan, you're just not right for the part. 
James Caan Ghost: It's because I'm a ghost, isn't it? 
Director: See if the actual James Caan is available. 
Aide: He is. 
Fabulous Guy, In A Moment of Reflection
Man: Sure, there are lots of "fabulous guys" out there...
Man: But I'm different. I'm deep. Special. UNIQUE! 
Man #2: This isn't a mirror, jerkoff. 
Man: Oh sorry. 
Percival Dunwoody, Idiot Time Traveler From 1909
Percival: Your 21st century is so progressive! 
Percival: It's even illegal to have Norwegian slaves! 
Man: It's NEVER been legal to have Norwegian slaves! 
Percival: Right. I have to go back to 1909...
If you like the Whoopee Cushion, you'll love...
the Whoopee Whoopi!
Before your friends sits down, slip Whoopi Goldberg on his choir, and laugh at the hilarious sounds that ensue! 
- Yes, rush me a Whoopee Whoopi! Check or money order is enclosed!
- No, do not send me a Whoopee Whoopi. 
- Why on earth would Whoopi Goldberg agree to this? She's a talented actress with a successful television show. 
- It is against my religion to check all boxes in advertising forms, so please take my silence as a binding agreement to purchase a Whoopee Whoopi, and send me one immediately, C.O.D.
- Is Meredith Vieira available?
- I am Whoopi Goldberg, and I can tell you right now I never agreed to this, honey. 
- I would prefer to go to Whoopi Goldberg's house and have her sit on me. Check or money order is enclosed. 
Whoopee Whoopi
c/o Whoopee Novelty, LLC
WABC Television
New York, NY
Upon Ms. Goldberg's arrival, please have a veggie platter, two (2) cans of bacon ranch Pringles, and six (6) bottles of Perrier ready. No exceptions or substitutions (See rider.)
Apr 1, 2011
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