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May 5, 2014
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spring vermin a brief guide

rat: everyone would love me if my tail was fuzzy.
rats as big as cats
range - there's one under your chair
description - large & rat-like.

those damn hoppy bugs that always jump right at you
range - your basement.
description - too horrifying to behold.

little drop-kick sweater dogs
range - the end of some old lady's leash.
description - some of them wear little matching hats, too. (the dogs.)

frogs with extra legs
range - all-you-can-eat french restaurants.
description - tastes just like mutated chicken.

canadian romping sloths
free-ranging.
description - a nice change from the common inert sloth until a herd of them move through & flatten your azaleas.
May 12, 2014
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