Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for April 30, 2011

Transcript:

it's free comic book day!!! issue 34 collector's edition captain rolemodel rmc unlike most, captain rolemodel practices preventive spuerheroics. captain: what's that below? a child! engaged in aimless loitering! must get to him in time! everybody knows kids need positive role models. captain: else they may grow up to be supervillains, like slugman or the sullen creep or the fiendish mr. uh-oh! captain: if i'm too late, this kid could eventually become dr. negatron, ph.d, criminal mastermind! he's a ticking timebomb! out of my way! oh, why can't I fly? kid: wow! captain rolemodel! i thought you wore a cape. captain: not any more. it was a choking hazard, like if someone grabbed it from behind. whew uh puf captain: now, under the influence of my positive mentoring power, you will become a productive member of society! kid: gosh soon- captain: aren't i a refreshing change from all those dark, angst-ridden superheroes? kid: and how! for the first time in my young life, i feel a sense of structure & purpose! x-ray pants loads of laffs! slight cancer risk all sizes - $1795 the visible potato c-d model not a toy it's a real working, potato! $2.99 better posture instantly! newmiracle spinal fluid additive throw your sense of smell! information booklet 35c big money learn mink ranching at home $$ puny? try our escalator shoes! patented pair - $1599 rubber goiters by mail! special value - 99c