Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for January 15, 2021

Once upon a time, Marigold got hoof polish because, UNICORN! The end.

By that logic, there must be nothing cooler than stamp collecting.

so how are the weirdo girl and her unicorn and other mystical creature friends are going to fix the ex-cool/popular girl’s dilemma?

You have to be like all the other popular kids to be cool.

What COLOR hoof polish?

Well I marathoned Adventure Time twice (Hulu and the Complete Collection DVD) and had a lot of fun doing so. Guess that means it’s not cool then, right?

Horse.com Item# SLT700300, Twinkle Toes Hoof Polish. Color Choices: Gold, Silver, Pink, Purple, or Blue glitter or Rainbow Stars. Marigold gets the Rainbow Stars.

That’s how I have always seen coolness. That’s why I have answered the call of the wierd.

The connection between be cool and be boring is something I’ve observed since childhood.

I like that their immediate assumption from all of this is that “cool” equals “boring.” :P

Marigold has a Shield of Boringness…

we used motor oil

Omg hoof polish?! I have to hear this!!!! Marigold starts talking and I silently walk away.

Self-deprecation much?

Not boring; one must be non-threatening.

Marigold makes a good point. It must be boring to be cool, why else would the cool kids focus on the nerdy ones so much?

I guess hipsterism is out.

REALLY?! To be cool you hafta be BORING!? Ok then! ~ starts being boring at school ~ * after class * Well that was a LIE.

If it’s cool why did she fall asleep?

Being queen bee is all about control. Other-girl control vanishes the instant she loses a contest. There are limitless possibilities to dethrone her.

Guys, you’re mixing what interests you, and what impresses everyone else. Being cool takes wearing sun glasses and leaning on a wall. see Snoopy

I always feel like a jerk when I like an ep and it bumps the likes from 93 to 94… oh well.