Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for September 04, 2019

I don’t blame that unicorn, those are good Doritos.

Rumor has it that the fauns still maintain a presence. In fact, one of Dakota’s friends occasionally visits the parking lot without really understanding why.

How do fauns gallivant at a gas station convenience store? – No; wait – I don’t want to know. Eww.

I think Orange Stardust was called such probably neigh wanted to clash with the Doritos’ colored crumbs.

I used to go to a convenience store called “Fabulous Freddy’s”. It had huge soda mugs and free popcorn for customers. Also had a mini coffee shop and a cool view of a carwash. Oh and sweet donuts on Saturdays. Good times.

“When a Unicorn is long enough in one place,…

…the place will take on some of her magic.”

Ummmmmm…“Her”? ……… Does this issue only apply to female Uni’s?

So basically the cousin of Sunset Shimmer. Or lost sibling.

I can attest to the appeal of the ‘extra (Flamin’)-hot’ Doritos’.

Why all unicorn legends take place after 1950s?

Will we see trolls hanging out at Phoebe’ s house? Will they steal her socks?

“. . . some of HER magic”? Are ALL unicorns female? If not, do male unicorns have no magic to rub off onto their environment? I know Marigold Heavenly Nostrils is all about herself, so I have to discount, even ignore, her supposedly humorous narcissism to examine what effect OTHER unicorns have on local environments. Can they combat climate change and counter global warming if asked to do so?

Her one weakness! Extra-hot doritos!

Since the legend is set at a gas station, it must be an urban legend like the Vanishing Hitchhiker story.

“Creatures that live in a unicorn’s woods learn a little magic of their own in time, mainly concerned with disappearing.” from “The Last Unicorn”

This whole story of Mari’s sounds like a lot of gas!

The extra-hot Doritos might just explain the Orange Stardust moniker…

Even tastier than oats and clover!

Hence the name Orange Stardust.

Female unicorns tend to exude magic over time by staying at one place. Male unicorns however, magically “mark” their territories almost immediately. One of the major signs of male unicorn marking is the smell of coffee… and people believing it’s worth $2+ a cup. Only magic could account for that.

“…gallivanting fauns…” Oh, the mental cartoons!

“A horde of gallivanting fauns” would get me to leave, post haste!

She got her name from her mother eating too many cheese puffs…

this happens to me all the time