Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for June 17, 2019

Here in Belgium (until very recently) that would be a photo at age 18, or whenever you got your license. Not bad he?

That’s harsh!

Cruel and unusual.

I once knew someone who swore that he was always hung over when he had his driver’s license photo taken. That way, when a cop stopped him and asked for his license, He would look like his picture.

I’m in favor of it. For several reasons. First, and by way of a confession, I have no online presence that demands a profile pic.

Second, the poetry of it. One photo, quickly and very unceremoniously taken while you are figuring out where to stand, is how all of bureaucratic and corporate America will know you. My last one makes me look like a famous, now murdered, gangster.

Third, the essential harmlessness of the sentence. You may look bad, but so does everyone else in their license photo. You feel silly? Welcome to the human race.

I don’t care. I’m bearly handsome anyways.

She must have been guilty of photoshop-lifting…

’I sentence you to be exposed before your peers….."

Must have done something horrible!

Ouch! Oh, that’s just mean!

I love the horrified look on her face.

Shows you how ugly I am, my driver’s license and passport photos actually make us look good.

GASP! …but …but…I’m not smiling….

Try to look as angry as possible, so when the cops look at your ID, they’ll be nervous about writing you a ticket.

But no one uses profile shots, so don’t worry.

I sentence you to read every Off the Mark comic with the caption changed to something from either Judge Parker or Rex Morgan MD.

For me the most severe sentence would be having to use my passport photo.

PJ & I always agreed that if you look like your license pic, you’re probably too sick to drive.

That’s what I use for my avatar.

Mine looks like I was found in a field, three days after my death. Probably why I haven’t been stopped in years. They assume I’m dead.