Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for September 22, 2017
September 21, 2017
September 25, 2017
Transcript:
april is national poetry month! beowulf in under 90 seconds here's a famous poem condensed! king: damn click the monster grendel is ravaging the country, devouring likewise warriors, maidens, mer-chants & passersby, effectively slowing the flow of tourist dollars to a thin trickle, much to the consternation of king hrothgar. whap whap comes the hero beowulf, who slays the monster grendel by pulling his (grendel's) arm clean off & slapping him with it fiercely about the head. knight: freeze! beowulf next deals with the monster grendel's mother in a bloody & protracted battle with much potential for cinematic spectacle given the right director (john woo?) & a sufficient budget. the grateful king hrothgar now gives beowulf the hand of his beloved daughter, princess wideload. beowulf opens a hero-themed restaurant where they slaughter the oxen right at your table.
Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 6 years ago
This could be almost any country in the Middle East right now. All waiting for their Beowulf. At least the names won’t be Hrothgar and Wideload.
ellisaana Premium Member over 6 years ago
And the poem for April is “Always Marry An April Girl” by Ogden Nash -
Praise the spells and bless the charms,
I found April in my arms.
April golden,April cloudy,
Gracious, cruel, tender, rowdy;
April soft in flowered languor,
April cold with sudden anger,
Ever changing, ever true —
I love April, I love you.
Sisyphos over 6 years ago
I do like the New and Improved happy ending….