Jul 31, 2014
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chagrin falls
"corporate sky-deity bless america"
mom: come on, everybody, hurry! we don't want to be late!
gavin: where's my tie??
son: do we have to go?
oop: of course we do!
son: ugh! after that hobby lobby supreme court decision, the stupid bank you work for decided to make up its own religion!
mom: yes, and as an employee, i'm required to go to its church, to help show that its beliefs are sincere.
son: but every sunday?!
mom: hello, chairman jones.
jones: ah, on sundays, it's chief religion officer jones.
dad: hey, could you speed things along today? kick-off's at one.
oop:...and so the great corporate sky-deity said to our corporation, "you shall not abide by minimum wage laws, for they are sinful."
mom: quit fidgeting!
oop: and lo, it said unto us, "it shall be an abomination to comply with the regulations of 12 c.f.r. 1003 on hoe mortgage disclosures..."
gavin: ...zzz..
mom: gavin!
gavin: nice service, chief religions officer jones. you've got a great american corporation!
jones: american? no, the great corporate sky-deity told us to reincorporate in bermude months ago! it's called squeezing through the tax loophole to heaven!
penelope: hello, corporate sky-deity? it's me. penelope!
the end
Aug 7, 2014
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