Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for July 11, 2013
Cobra: So, I ditch you for a while so I can amass a pirate fortune, and you toss me aside for some "scooby-doo" reject! Rip: She wouldn't leave me to be mauled to death by tigers. Cobra: Ooh! Take off your rainbow scented love glasses, big boy. You know what she's done to you? She's tricked you into believeing love is supposed to be warm and cuddly! Rip, get real! If you're not risking your life on a daily basis, love means nothing! Rip: Cobra, love should mean saying you're sorry for throwing me out of a helicopter!