Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for November 18, 2011
Jack: Dear Bliss, you know I adore you - can't you overlook my evil villainry and dastardly breath? Bliss: Never! Never! Never! Jack: Yeah? Well, you look fat when you're fearing for your life! Bill: Unchain our love, river jerk! Whir-a-cha-ching! Bliss: Bill? Bill: It's me, babe, I'm gross to look at right now, but I'm back! Bliss: Oh, Bill! Jack: Gaak! You're suffocating the smarm right out of my mustache!