Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 29, 2015
Zebra: I heard your l'il Guard Duck joined the Navy. Pig: Yeah. And he's already involved in his first naval engagement. Zebra: Oh, no. Against whom? Pig: Snuffles the cat. The two of them had a falling out. Guard Duck: It's not quite the monitor and the merrimac, is it?