Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 28, 2011
Goat: What happened to you? Rat: I got fat. Goat: Why? Rat: To get rich... see, if you're famous and you get fat, all you have to do is get unfat and people will pay you millions of dollars to write a book revealing how you de-fatified. Goat: Maybe you could start by using real words. Rat: Shut up and book me on 'Ellen.' Duck: More cheese-covered fried 'Twinkies,' sir?