Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 07, 2011
Pig: Cable's out again. Rat: That does it. I'm gonna call those cable idiots and rip into 'em. Voice (on the phone): Bombast Cable. How can we help you? Rat: Yeah. I- Is this a live person in this country? Voice: Yep. Rat: No 'Press 1 for this', 'Press 2 for that' and then being on hold for an hour? Voice: Nope. Rat: Yeah, well, I bet you still can't get out here 'til next week. Voice: Not true. We can be there today. Rat: Really? Voice: Really. Rat: Well, I bet the best you can do is give me a four-hour window in which you might be here. Voice: Nope. We'll be there at 3:00 p.m. on the dot. Rat: An exact time? Voice: Yep. Rat: Is this a dream? Voice: Yep. Rat: @*#@.