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Matt Bors

8,182
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Aug 1, 2011
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Once-mighty daily newspapers are dying like dogs, unable to make a buck in the Information Age. 
Man With Glasses: I'm not going to PAY for something I can get at home for FREE!
DRUDGE
EXACTLY. No self-respecting American would do that...UNLESS it is placed in a clear plastic shell. 
BOTTLED NEWS
Clear Spring POST
From the most pristine sources
Man: WOW! 
Woman: Nice label! 
Bottle a daily rag and people will suddenly want to drop $4.00 on it. 
Man: You DO realize what a rip-off that is? 
Woman: I CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE!
Print will be SAVED and loyal readers will SWEAR bottled is better!
Man With Glasses: The Times purifies David Brooks with "reverse osmosis."
He sucks much less now!
Aug 5, 2011
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