Pickles by Brian Crane for March 07, 2012

GREAT idea. Think I’ll disconnect my answering machine.

It might of been Nelson wanting to know if he couldcome over.

Caller ID screening, it’s a lifesaver. I don’t speak to machines, and I don’t expect anyone else too either. Please leave your message at the ‘click’ and before the dial tone.

My SIL’s family has done this for years. They sit and wait for a) someone else to pick it up or b) it to stop ringing. You say, “Hey, your phone’s ringing.” “Yeah, I know—it’ll stop.” In their case, it’s just laziness mostly. Can’t be bothered.

better yet, let’s disconnect the phone. The things a crying nuisance.

Don’t know which is scarier. Machines that sound like people or people that sound like machines.

LOL. My grandparents have been screening calls ever since i can remember. The machine picks up and you go something like “Hello? This is your only grandaughter. Are ya’ll home?” Then they might pick up.

A conversation with a friend of mine:

Me: Morris, aren’t you going to answer your phone?

Morris: Nope, if I wait long enough, it will stop ringing all by itself.

LOL. This is me sorry to say. I answer a phone all day at work, don’t want to do it at home.

99% of the time it’s telemarketers anyway. They never leave messages. And if the did, I wouldn’t return the call. So what would be the point of having an answering machine?

My dad used to say this to my mom. Phone would ring she asked him to answer it and he say never for me, she would then tell him the call is for him his brother.

When we get those durn calls I tell them do not call list. Phone calls close to ending. Dread the political calls. Live in KS and Republican caucus is coming Saturday here at civic center.

Beats answering stupid political robo calls!

“Hello, this is our telephone answering device. It makes the annoying ringing sounds stop.” Click. set the rings to answer at 3, and incoming message time length to “Zero”, and enjoy. anyone who really needs us, knows our cell numbers (why keep it? i have a fax machine XD)

Earl just wants to avoid all the Telemarketers that ignore the “Do Not Call List”. On the rare occasion that I answer the phone, and someone asks for me, I say "Tell me your full name and home phone number and what you want or I’m hanging up now.

" I’m really busy right now, BUT if you give me your HOME number I’ll give you a call back LATER tonight "

I have the perfect telemarketer stopper. You say loudly, “Wait, wait! Can I ask you a question?” They say, “Sure!” thinking you mean about something in the speil.Then you say in a very chirpy, bright voice: “Did you know Jesus Christ died for your sins?”

Silence. Silence. Click.You will find yourself magically disappearing off the call-lists.

I thought it was only me, but recently read that some people have a phone phobia. I never answer the phone unless nobody else is home and caller ID tells me who it is. I HATE phones, especially long, rambling chats. I would have loved them years ago, but now I feel like I’m being held hostage. Non-social, yes, I know. We do have cell phones but only use them for emergencies, like what brand of cereal do I want from the store. Communication is over-rated.

Caller ID. I don’t know you, I don’t answer. You don’t leave a message, it wasn’t important.

I usually let the machine answer. For those people who don’t want to talk to a machine and don’t leave a number or message, well, I can’t phone back and probably didn’t want to talk to them anyway. The phone should be for my convenience.

Ditto…ring! Caller:Hi whatcha doing?Me: sleeping till you woke me up….

I actually have a little fun with telemarketers. If I’m close to the phone to answer it, I don’t let them give me their pitch, I immediately give them my pizza order. I tell them I’m so glad they called so I could order my pizza. I remind them to please cut them in squares. I last ordered a pizza from Sears and they haven’t called me back.

One time I had a new unlisted phone number and did not know it was published in the phone book as an after-hours number for a car dealer. A guy called me asking where his car was. Told him it was on the moon. Boy did he panic!! I called the phone company the next day asking how they can give me a unlisted number that is still published in their phone book. I got a new number for free.

Seinfeld — Season 4, Episode 3: “The Pitch”

TEL: Hi, would you be interested in switching over to TMI long distance service.

JERRY: Oh, gee, I can’t talk right now. Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you later.

TEL: Uh, I’m sorry we’re not allowed to do that.

JERRY: Oh, I guess you don’t want people calling you at home.

TEL: No.

JERRY: Well now you know how I feel. [Hangs up]

lol serenasakitty, I wish!

You also get callers calling the number they were last given for the previous owner of the phone number. You tell them their party is not there, yet they keep calling you back. Finally, I told the caller the person they were asking for was not home. They then asked me when they would be home. I told them “Never”. Last time they called.

Coffee-Turtle, I actually had a long distance carrier call me to tell me they could decrease my long distance bills. I was actually impressed!! I asked him how he could decrease my bills to lower than $0.00 when I don’t have a long distance carrier??

When I KNOW it is a telemarketer/political ad/etc. I turn the phone on and immediately hang up (click on, click off). Then I don’t have to listen to it ring or go through deleting the robo call message. No muss, no fuss. If my husband answers it, he will tell them we are on the do not call list (yes, a joke) and whistles as loud as he can. He just loves doing that!

My 16 year old techno genius son tells me that if you answer and the other end is silent after you say hello, then its an auto dial tele marketer, when you answer your phone, the computer signals to Mujibar that theres a fish on the line…if you hear that silence after you answer, start hitting the #### sign…. Apparently it will lock up their hard drive……

Inspector Monkeyblues, thanks for the tip. I’ll try that next time. I get a LOT of phantom phone calls, so I’ll try that next time.

We don’t have a land line. We each have a cell phone (or whatever it’s called these days) My grandson programed mine to go directly to voice mail unless its one of the numbers I have on my spead dial so my phone only rings if it’s one of my family or the doctors office. I’m rather impatient and antisocial myself.

Works for me. Why not disconnect the ringer. Answering machine still works.

That’s me too! If you really need me – shoot me an email and I will read it when I want to and reply if I want. On top of telemarketing people, I have some mighty annoying “friends” who call any day of day or night and won’t leave the phone for hours!