Honestly, I wish I’d sat down with my parents and had a long talk about a lot of things. We did that, bit by bit, in the year I lived at home while waiting for a good ticket price for Australia.
I was very overdue.. and a lot of things were explained on both sides. I still laugh at Daddy saying “You were NOT a fat child!” .. ummm…. as size 12 at 10 ain’t slender! I know they loved me and I loved them. I just wish my husband and I could have gone back for a visit before they passed :(
We did keep in touch via Skype, which was wonderful for all of us though. They adored my husband, Mama said to him that she was grateful that he was taking such good care of her baby. She never had called me her baby when I was old enough to understand it! I burst into tears after that call :)
I agree that people should have these conversations when these feelings first come up. When stuff sits and festers, it’s going to come out anyway. The person just loses control over when and how.
My mother & I had the best relationship…until I graduated high school. Suddenly, we couldn’t stand each other. The night I left home was melodramatic and intense (and I will NOT share it here…it’s still painful, even after almost 40 years). She even sent my older brother to my workplace to take my house key. My parents DID come to my wedding about a month later, but things were…tense. Finally, I wrote my mother a poem, completely bringing everything out into the open…decorated it, framed it, and gave it to her at her surprise 60th birthday party. She cried, I cried, we hugged. It cleared the air. Things were never exactly the same as before, and we both agreed that we shouldn’t spent TOO much time together, and that poem was on the wall of her bedroom for years.
Give your mom a chance, Andy. After all, she will someday be gone forever. I wish my mom and dad were here to see their grandchildren and great grandchildren. They have both been gone for 40 years.
I was very lucky with my mom. When my dad died, I agreed to live with her so she could stay in her home. We became best friends. She accepted that I would nod in agreement or smile politely when she suggested stuff, then I’d quietly do what I wanted. I gave in to the really important stuff. It worked for us for over thirty years until she died.
My mother and I did best apart. Limited communication. Then I got very ill in 2006. Had to move in with her. For the first 2 years she took care of me. The last 2 years I took care of her (cancer). So it was oddly symmetrical those last years.
Templo S.U.D. over 4 years ago
The “Tums incident” must be Andrea’s version of Calvin’s “noodle incident.” (This is going to be quite the mother/daughter talk.)
PammWhittaker over 4 years ago
Honestly, I wish I’d sat down with my parents and had a long talk about a lot of things. We did that, bit by bit, in the year I lived at home while waiting for a good ticket price for Australia.
I was very overdue.. and a lot of things were explained on both sides. I still laugh at Daddy saying “You were NOT a fat child!” .. ummm…. as size 12 at 10 ain’t slender! I know they loved me and I loved them. I just wish my husband and I could have gone back for a visit before they passed :(
We did keep in touch via Skype, which was wonderful for all of us though. They adored my husband, Mama said to him that she was grateful that he was taking such good care of her baby. She never had called me her baby when I was old enough to understand it! I burst into tears after that call :)
jpayne4040 over 4 years ago
I agree that people should have these conversations when these feelings first come up. When stuff sits and festers, it’s going to come out anyway. The person just loses control over when and how.
Wren Fahel over 4 years ago
My mother & I had the best relationship…until I graduated high school. Suddenly, we couldn’t stand each other. The night I left home was melodramatic and intense (and I will NOT share it here…it’s still painful, even after almost 40 years). She even sent my older brother to my workplace to take my house key. My parents DID come to my wedding about a month later, but things were…tense. Finally, I wrote my mother a poem, completely bringing everything out into the open…decorated it, framed it, and gave it to her at her surprise 60th birthday party. She cried, I cried, we hugged. It cleared the air. Things were never exactly the same as before, and we both agreed that we shouldn’t spent TOO much time together, and that poem was on the wall of her bedroom for years.
chris_o42 over 4 years ago
Give your mom a chance, Andy. After all, she will someday be gone forever. I wish my mom and dad were here to see their grandchildren and great grandchildren. They have both been gone for 40 years.
the lost wizard over 4 years ago
Mom doesn’t seem to have been all that observant.
marilynnbyerly over 4 years ago
I was very lucky with my mom. When my dad died, I agreed to live with her so she could stay in her home. We became best friends. She accepted that I would nod in agreement or smile politely when she suggested stuff, then I’d quietly do what I wanted. I gave in to the really important stuff. It worked for us for over thirty years until she died.
Stephen Gilberg over 4 years ago
Maybe Paige will feel the same way about Andy in middle age.
Night-Gaunt49[Bozo is Boffo] over 4 years ago
My mother and I did best apart. Limited communication. Then I got very ill in 2006. Had to move in with her. For the first 2 years she took care of me. The last 2 years I took care of her (cancer). So it was oddly symmetrical those last years.