PreTeena by Allison Barrows for September 27, 2016

If you wear a Harry Potter sort of invisibility cloak, will protect you from being “seen” by ultraviolet rays?

My sister-in-law, who is a year younger than me, used to slather Crisco on her skin before sitting out in the sun.

Was her nickname KFC,Mrs. Fahel?

Several years ago, I saw a list of the worst ideas in the history of humanity. Very near the top of the list was suntans.

Our concoction was baby oil with some iodine in it. Why? I don’t know. But we started as early in the year as possible. The ultimate was to be out in the sun so much your hair bleached on top, in the manner of the champion surfers of the day, The Beach Boys’ “bushy, bushy blonde hairdo.” White zinc oxide on the nose was also specified. It both marked you as an aspiring pro who spent every daylight hour on the beach and did indeed prevent the unsightly nose peeling.

Why is Stick wearing a bathing cap if she’s not going to swim?

With skin like that sunbathing is just cancer inducing. 10 minutes or less.

And back in the days of hippies and bushy-bushy-blonde hairdos, there wasn’t any talk of skin cancer. Everybody though the worst thing you could get was sunburn.

Then, one day late in that era, my mother (r.i.p.) got sun POISONING. Whole new perspective on things.

I do remember trying to tan when I was a teenager. Unfortunately, I freckle, burn, then peel. After both parents developed skin cancer, I started taking precautions. At first I used sunblock, then found going out after 4pm, covering up or staying inside was less of a hassle.

Some girls used to lie on tinfoil while tanning, to get even more sun.

An amazing irony about whites wanting to “tan” their skin darker. And just playing with cancer and irradiation. Nutty.

I’m ‘white’ and totally agree. Never been one to lay in the sun.