The Buckets by Greg Cravens for July 17, 2015

HA!

Or maybe they just make $&!~ up.

Pulp magazines used to run ads for “spurious spanish fly” trusting that anyone dimwitted enough to think Spanish fly was an aphrodisiac wouldn’t know what spurious meant anyway.

I could do that job so well and so happily… until I found out that someone believed what I wrote. That’d worry me.

The ones that really make me wonder are the secrets “taken to the grave” by a recently deceased celebrity. If they had, then there is no way a tabloid reporter could be writing about it.

I agree with you Sarah.

My favorite headline was “Skull of Goliath Found!”. Had a picture of a skull with a stone in the forehead.

If I remember it correctly, many years ago, there was one “Elvis’ Alien Baby!”

“Secret Food That Stops Aging”

I’m only 20 but that part got my attention!

xxx

The reason that the tabloids like the word “secret”, at least in this particular context, is that it lets their readership believe that they’re in on something that the general public doesn’t know. The term “alleged” would only mean that whatever’s on the page is mere speculation and/or rumor, thus confirming the worthlessness of the so-called “information” contained therein.

Well, seriously … in a publication titled “Weak World News”, whaddya expect?