Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for August 26, 2014

At least it’s not a bucket of ice water.

Uh oh…so that’s what the fellas were plotting in their “think tank” a while back! He’s definitely going to get some strong feedback from the neighbors about this.

Ted made a slight miscalculation in his height-trajectory angle.

Ted is going to have much to answer for!I just noticed the time! I need to be up in 5 hours, so Good Night, all…

Who said that high school physics doesn’t pay off?

Ted always allowed for the crosswind.

And to think how Marianne laughed when he spent all those Saturdays in the Helmond’s basement rec room, with the Ballard Turtle, Tortoise and Trigonometry Club.

Not only did he mold Horace, their old tortoise, into the fine racing beast he is today, despite his age and bad back….

But just look at him now!

Won’t Marianne be proud!

However, as Ted sees Gil striding purposefully towards him, he begins to calculate a new set of coordinates…

Sorry I missed Monkey’s B.Day…..Moving all last week. Kept up on IPhone but could not post….Sorry Monkey belated wishes anyway.However I can see the years Ted yearned to be in Army Artillery has been put to good use. Ted was unable to join due to flat feet so he was unable to live out his dream of dropping 155mm shells on unsuspecting folks.However he can only use a water hose as the government (in some ridiculous reason) would not sign off on his permit for a M777 field gun.

He does the same thing at Jiffy Lube…..

We can only hope that Ted’s little experiment doesn’t lead to the sort of incident that occured between Will and Dill a few years ago!There are just certain folks on Ballard Street that you don’t want to mess with…

Ted’s just reliving his days as valuable member of a Mortar Team

“Fox four, Fox four, this is Bravo two. Adjust fire, over,”“Fire for effect”“Bravo two this is Fox four, adjust fire out.” “Grid 455-288. Enemy platoon in the open, over” “Direction 2400, Distance six meters” ‘out’.“Fire when ready, over,”“fire on my command.’ “Shot over” “Shot out.”“Splash over”. “Splash out.”

Thanks for the Head’s up, Essex. Looks as if everybody needs to break out the rain gear today, even if you’re not planning to pass by Ted’s house… since He’s gone Mobile!!!

I mean EVERYBODY!

A diabolical parabolical fount.

Dogs dont need to talk, a wag, a woof, we know what they mean!

pcolli….. I’m not surprised….turtles and tortoises having, as they do, a natural affinity for angles and their measurement, owing to the shape of their shells.

Twinkly!

Do Ted and Marianne know you’ve taken those nice home movies of Horace?

yes, Marianne has told me how hard it is to put on his little back brace… what with the shell getting in the way and all.

Still…. he loves racing…doesn’t even mind all the prep…

They tried training his offspring, Horace Jr., and Horacina, right from the beginning…

But Horacina wasn’t too interested….

and Horace Jr. now prefers the skateboard races.

Happy3 …hmm….I never know whether that’s a doggy swear word or just a happy exclamation….

And of course, you all know I’m ready for anything Ted dishes out….

Oh, the Humanities! You really should have stayed off the streets once you knew what Ted was up to!