Monty by Jim Meddick for September 22, 2013

so all of them I could see but the unfair traded, at least if it’s sold in the US it has to be slaughtered in a 1st world country.

Bacon! (So what if it’s a tad “aged”?)I would so buy Monty’s Hipster Foodie Repellent if he marketed it!

Maybe he has finally found his niche, creating disgusting aromas. Wait! My husband already does that!

Don’t forget…. it also smells like a genetically malodorous, artificially deodorized, unwashed, ozone-destroying, Axe™-drenched Monty.

That in itself puts most people off their feed.

As for wanting to buy a product containing the scent he just developed….

I think a fair imitation can be found in a jar of fake bacon bits from the dollar store.

It’s not science unless you wear your grandma’s pink bonnet.

BTW, is that first customer Tom Waits?

You have never cleaned Honey Buckets, have you?

Ah, Monty, I don’t think you need any help in repelling people.

Ah, smells!It IS (after all) very subjective. As I commented on Daddy’s today, my raw garlic may repel some . . .New young doctor seeing me around 10AM last week remarked about my telling him that I have 10-15gm of raw garlic per day in addition to 2 Kaolic, that it MAY affect my breath but I had that pasta less than 3 hours before. He did not seem to notice garlic breath.If I had a companion dining with me, he would also have the garlic because it tastes great as well as having health benefits.

Smells I dislike: cooked cabbage, men’s colognes, scented candles (raw beeswax smells great), old sweat (fresh sweat from same day is nice), bodily excrements and dirty feet..Now you need some Brain Bleach!

How do you stuff lentils with vodka?.Now if that pork rind was rancid? I think he would have a winner.

If I wasn’t already dieting, these comments would put me on one. lol

Still laughing. Keep it up!