Ted Rall for March 17, 2007

Transcript:

Christian conservatives have been troubled to learn that presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani has divorced every woman on earth over age 18. (Giuliani: 3 or 4 starter marriages? That's normal for a Republican. At 1,829,349,858 you start to question a man's judgment.) But analysts say the real question is: what kind of divorces are they? (Man: Conservative voters can look past a messy past- if your exes say you're a stand-up guy.) Unfortunately for "American's mayor," many of his former spouses remain bitter that he hardly spent any time with them. (Woman: Considering that Mr. 9/11 went through 55 wives a minute, I'm lucky he gave me a full second.) Men, on the other hand, view Giuliani more favorably than ever. (Man 2: I always tell my wife: at least I'm not as bad as your first husband, Rudy!)