Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for August 11, 2012
Dutch: Rip, what are you saying? You're talking like a knock-kneed schoolgirl! Rip: I'm out, pop! I can't handle the danger game anymore! I've seen things that would make George Lucas never change a "Star Wars" film again! As long as I love, these fists will ever taste the sweet, bowel-cleansing flavor of justice again! From this day forward, I will be known as Rip Haywire: man of peace! Dutch: I always knew your mom was girly-fying you, but I never thought it would come to this!