Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for March 31, 2015
richard's poor almanac --- by richard thompson smithsonian fundraising some simple solutions scam artists, grifters & patsies two centuries of american shakedowns snake oil & nostrums for sale 3 card monte see the egress $5 the old shell game an interactive hall of swindles in the museum of american history would scare up some funds nice and quick. plus, the rubes would think it's educa-tional!... tourists, i mean, not rubes. haha! headphones: as we enter the first ladies' gowns exhibit, i sure hope the crumbling ceiling doesn't fall on you. sigh. we've been a little short (sniff) on funds (sniff sniff) lately (choke)- woman 1: aw. woman 2: what a shame! why not add a little pathos to those audiotour recordings? then put a donation box somewhere handy and watch the cash come rolling in! man: another one? kid 1: ooh, it's got smithsonian secretary lawrence small! kid 2: i want it! i want it! squished penny machines are the major source of income for many tourist destinations, like the louvre & west virginia. thirty of forty of 'em in each museum oughta do the trick! hey! larry small! you hear me?