Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 05, 2011
Pig: Hey, Rat. Whatcha watching? Rat: The start of the Super Bowl. The players run out of the locker rooms and down this tunnel, then emerge from the cloud of smoke onto the field. Pig: THE LOCKER ROOM'S ON FIRE! THE LOCKER ROOM'S ON FIRE! Rat: I see the pre-game show has confused you. Pig: RUN FASTER, FAT MEN, FASTER!!