Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 12, 2011
Goat: Did you see this story about 'the Family Circus'? Someone bought the movie rights for seven figures. Pig: What's the movie gonna be about? Goat: They don't know yet. They're asking potential righters to submit the opening few pages of a script to see who best captures the strip's family-friendly spirit. FADE IN: JEFFY, fat and tattooed, sits on death row receiving last rites. JEFFY Skip it, Reverend. The Jeffy don't fear death.