FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for September 24, 2008
Paige: Jason, your stupid iguana got out of his stupid cage again! He slipped into my room, into my closet, and chewed up the brand-new pink cardigan that was going to get me a boyfriend this year! I want to know what you're going to do about this! Jason: Probably giggle all night long. Whoever the idiot was who said "honesty is the best policy" Paige: I don't need the sweater back, by the way.