Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 03, 2006

Transcript:

"Sir. Good morning, sir. Permission to speak freely, sir?" "Of course, little guard duck." "Sir, today I looked up at the sky and saw something sad." "What was it?" "Ducks, sir. Flying, sir. No one ever told me ducks could fly, sir." "Your parents didn't teach you?" "I never knew my parents, sir." "<i>Ohhh,</i> little guard duck..." "They can fly, sir... I'm a broken duck, sir." "Don't say that, l'il guard duck! I'll help you! But first we're gonna cheer you up! What would you like to do? Go to the park?... Play some Frisbee? Get some ice cream?" "Firebomb the Johnsons?" "Ice cream's good, too, sir."