Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for November 11, 2000

Transcript:

Did you know? this week-- The Universe Most people think that the scientists who investigate the nature of the universe are layabouts trying to avoid real work. In fact, their research has yielded literally dozens of fun facts! The universe is infinitely huge! You can get a sense of just how immense it is by imagining dollar bills lined up from one end of the Universe to the other... That line of dollars would be infinite! How important is the Universe? The Universe has been host to the past 34 super bowls, that's all! Whenever visually representing the universe, it's important to include a picture of Saturn! Quantum physicists, who examine the universe on a subatomic level, have concluded that something fishy is going on here!! Scientists believe that if you could restart Time from the Big Bang, the entire Universe would be different today, except for Christian Slater! Lovely Jennifer Aniston is composed solely of atoms from our universe! The universe is a vast godless void utterly indifferent to Human Suffering and to whether or not your ex-girlfriend Anne will ever return to you! The Universe has existed for 12 billion years, spawning Black Holes, White Dwarf Stars and Quarks, and yet has won no Oscars!