For Better or For Worse by Lynn Johnston for September 18, 2017

Michael just cannot trust ANYbody!

He will come to find out that the guys do the same thing. Only way worse, in a more crude way.

Ahh,they’re just jealous!

Typical man. When things go wrong for him, he blames the woman.

The most amusing part of this to me is that Michael spent so much time leaning up against those lockers staring into space and thinking big thought bubbles, Gordon and Lawrence had enough time to wander off and find paper, marker and tape so they could tape, “Call me Hot Lips!” on his back when finally stopped with the thinking.

Now Michael will either have to live with being associated with a M*A*S*H character or he will suffer the horror of being known as the guy who kissed a girl. Maybe both. How will he live down the shame?

That’s what friends are for, right?

“sally kellerman or loretta switt”? I’d take them both!

Michael can’t win for loosing.

He’s supposed to be 12? By that time, boys are proud of having kissed a girl.

Its not the kissing,it’s the things he talked about with Martha that she might have shared with her friends that concerns Mike most of all.Guys don’t like to appear vulnerable,especially in front of their peers.

Girls might think exactly the same thing HE does, in the case of “kiss and tell”; we’re all just people, after all.

You’d think he’d be bragging about having kissed someone, not ashamed or embarrassed. Surprised his friends aren’t asking “So how was it?” since I doubt they’ve kissed anyone yet!

Aside from the kissing, let’s look at all the dumb things Mike said to Martha at summer camp and see if any of them can be considered embarrassing:

Friday August 18, 2017 – “I dunno. How come you’re not at the campfire?”

Intelligence rating: Pretty good. A nice response to Martha’s accusation that he is crazy.

Saturday August 19, 2017 – “What’s your name?” “Yeah, I got named after one of mother’s high school friends. I never even met the guy…and I have to be named after him!”

Intelligence rating: Pretty high. He is making conversation and sharing interesting information and his “and” even has a “d” in it.

Monday August 21, 2017 – “Me, too!” “Me, too!” “Yeah!”

Intelligence rating: Not so good. Nothing embarrassing, but not impressive.

Saturday August 26, 2017 – “Only one day left Martha an’ then we hafta go home.””I, um…What I wanna say is…uh…that I” “I don’t know. My lips won’t work.”

Intelligence rating: This one is bad. He can’t speak. He can’t put together sentences. He even drops the “d” from “and”. What’s worse is that he was talking this same way when he greeted Martha in the hall in front of her friends.

Thursday, September 14, 2017 “Uh-Martha? Um…Hi!” “I, um, thought I’d just say, you know, Hi!!”

I can see Martha telling her friends, “I got a boyfriend at summer camp named Michael. He really liked holding hands and marching in silence. He is a good kisser. But, he has a hard time speaking with words, so if he speaks to me, try not to laugh too much.” All things considered, the issue for Michael is not so much dumb things he told her, but dumb things he was incapable of telling her.

What a sticky mess we humans can be!

Yeah, you can trust them alright,… to make a fool out of you!

Of course she was dumb to be kiss and tell. Her name is Martha, not Smart-ha!