Stone Soup by Jan Eliot for February 09, 2010

Panel 4: even Holly isn’t buying what Holly’s saying.

Howsabout this: For the upcoming spring break, Holly should go to [wherever Gramma is now] and help Gramma build houses. Being TOLD how privileged you are is rarely very enlightening. Seeing for yourself, however, is.

hehe somebodyshort why shouldn’t she be in need of money - I don’t know a single teenager who couldn’t use a bit more money…

Holly is 13.

A 13 year old just wants to be independent and have everything that her friends have. Unfortunately she doesn’t realize what being truly independent entails, and her friends may have more money than she has.

Hey Jan, can you draw the video feed more realistically- give Gram a really big nose!

Perspective in life is everything.

You do sort of have to see for yourself, not just read about it. A picture is worth 1000 words. It would be a good idea for Holly to spend a summer vacation (a school break isn’t long enough) with Grandma in Thailand or wherever she is at the time.

Maybe Holly needs to go to Haiti help out there from the massive earthquate. There will be rebuilding needed. I wonder if Grandma will be heading there next.

Why does everyone like to tell a person that their problems are not important and they have things easy?

you tell her, grandma!

If you are venting about not being happy with your situation, Holly, and you know it and your audience knows it., you might gain some empathy. But if you carrying on like your situation really is the worst in the world, there are always people in situations worse than whatever situation you are upset about. Perhaps Holly’s problem is a lack of experience out in the world and she really does need to get out and experience something other than her (relatively) sheltered existance. From a parable: “I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet. -Anonymous”

I least Jan is protraying Holly as she is on this strip. How many other teenagers feel this way? I have no teenagers mine are young adults. My daughter knows the value of garage sales and try’s to save there as well.

As I recall, Holly did help her grandmother once. Her conversion seems to have worn off.

And Grandma, as my therapist used to say, just because my problems aren’t as bad as someone else’s doesn’t make them any less real.

“serenasakitty said,

Why does everyone like to tell a person that their problems are not important and they have things easy?”

Probably so they’ll stop focusing on all the things they don’t have and be grateful for the things they do have. Narcissism isn’t very attractive, but she’s a teenager and many teenagers go through this stage. Unfortunately, some never outgrow it.

Too bad that Holly (and many other privileged youth) can’t trade places with children her age from Third World countries for a period of time… Then MAYBE she could learn to appreciate her many blessings and find she has nothing, or very little, to complain about.

It’s really annoying and totally unconvincing when somebody goes to a Third World country and then tries to be so self-righteous to everybody else. Gramma shouldn’t even say stuff like that to Holly when she can’t identify with it.

A friend of mine told me a story about his (then) 12-year-old son. Son was whining and complaining and saying “Life isn’t fair!”.

Father replied, “Yep, and most of it’s not fair in your favor.”

When I was 13 (and even a lot younger) I envied other girls in my school because their parents bought them nicer things. Most of my clothes and even shoes were from a resale shop (where donations were made by older people) so when I went on to HS, other kids sometimes called me “teach” because my “style” was similar to the teachers more than to other sudents;-( My first job was bank teller and I immediately splurged on some shoes from the fanciest store and other things I had always wanted AND I taught myself to sew…fabric was cheap then because of many mills in the US!

I know it’s late and probably nobody will read this, but…

serenasakitty makes an excellent point. Just because someone’s problems aren’t major problems compared to somebody else’s problems half-way around the world doesn’t mean that those problems aren’t important to that person. By saying a person’s problems aren’t important, although those problems are clearly important to that person, you are by extension saying that that person is not important. Not that you have to drop everything to solve those problems, but don’t just dismiss them as unimportant.

If it means anything: I read it ( :

I read it too. Valid point. It is both important to recognize people’s feelings as valid, and for those people to also have some perspective.

somebodyshort , if your parents arent going to buy showy clothing then u need money to buy them yourself.