Ted Rall for November 03, 2000
Historia de la politica de los estados unidos It's 1988 all over again! Gore is Dukakis, the charisma-deprived technocrat. Right now, my wife is drunk on mouthwash. Did you know it's 16% alcohol? Bush is Bush I, the dopey, inrticulate rich boy. Cash... I like cash. Winner. It's 1980 all over again! Gore is Carter, the southern nice guy nobody likes. Inflation is high but wages are rising faster, so it's OK. Bush is Reagan, the clueless, smirking plain talker. That's not a fez. It's my hair. Winner. It's 1956 all over again! Gore is Adlai, the bookish right choice everyone secretly resents. I'm much smarter than you. Bush is like, the vague dimwit trading on past glory. I was a general. I won world war II. Winner. It's all over again! We're democrats if our parents were and it's not raining on election day. The dew point's too high to vote. We're republican if we're Reagan democrats and independents. Objectively speaking, Bush is the smartest, coolest guy ever!