Ted Rall for July 10, 1997
Transcript:
The earth was in a bad way. Everywhere you looked people were polluting and developing the land. The environmentalists came up with an idea. (Man: We'll buy up land and make it into wilderness preserves the bastards can't touch!) The only problem was, for every acre of land they saved, another acre of parkland was given away by the government to the developers and polluters. (Man: Public owned parks are inefficient. Let's let the market decide the fate of nature!) Eventually every inch of land was owned by either the ecologists or the scum. Since all the property was tied up. Real estate prices soared. The environmentalists couldn't pay their property taxes and the government seized the pristine land to give it to the polluters. (Man: Private owned parks are doomed to failure! That's why we're strip mining our last remaining park!) Despite everything that had happened, no one held a grudge. (Man: The polluters are willing to sell us their land after they're done with it.)