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Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal by Zach Weinersmith for August 13, 2014
The mean date-free path is given by the inhabited volume of Earth, divided by my cross-sectional area multiplied by square root times the number of potential mates. This explanation for your lack of dates only works if we assume you're an ideal gas molecule. I'm small and nobody's attracted to me. Carry on then. Thank you.
If you start with the assumption that you’re unattractive because you’re an ideal gas molecule, then why bother with any further explanation?